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Bjorn is tending the bar today at dVerse.
He’s looking for quadrilles (exactly 44 words excluding the title) using the word “breeze” somewhere in the body of the poem.
This is what the word “breeze” blew up in my head. 🙂
I’m afraid I had a little fun with the words.
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May 30, 2016 @ 22:16:29
Oh I love the formatting… and I do love the thought of seeking the breeze in those heights.. it sounds like soldiers in their bright red coats.
May 30, 2016 @ 22:20:45
Thank you for the great prompt!!!
May 30, 2016 @ 22:31:06
I love the formatting too – so creative!
May 30, 2016 @ 22:33:32
Thank you, Freya! I just read your verse and made a similar comment! 😊
May 30, 2016 @ 22:38:28
So I see! 😉
May 30, 2016 @ 23:30:51
Love the formatting of that breeze…such a relief in a heat ~
May 31, 2016 @ 05:35:38
How welcome that breeze must have been after an uphill trek in wool coats in summer! I can’t even imagine. 😊
May 31, 2016 @ 00:00:58
Simply charming!
May 31, 2016 @ 05:35:52
😊
May 31, 2016 @ 00:41:04
FANASTIC formatting, and a great piece.
May 31, 2016 @ 05:39:52
Thanks, De. Every time I drive up this 2000 ft “hill,” I imagine these guys and crack a window.
May 31, 2016 @ 01:25:27
Lots of fun! I like shape poems muchly. Can’t seem to do ’em; which is odd, because I’m visual. But there you go! Great poem.
May 31, 2016 @ 05:40:50
I’m sure you can! Just takes a bit of silliness. 😊
May 31, 2016 @ 02:02:55
I “marched with them,” gasping for air. The breeze was a relief.
May 31, 2016 @ 05:42:23
😊 In summer I live for that breeze!
May 31, 2016 @ 02:29:13
Reading this felt like moving along, marching along. The formatting was most original and such fun.
May 31, 2016 @ 05:43:21
Thank you. I had second thought about the formatting, but threw caution to the wind. 😊
May 31, 2016 @ 02:59:45
Makes me curious about the backstory… nicely done!!
May 31, 2016 @ 05:48:30
It was a messy scramble for land. They call it The Siege of Eshowe. Didn’t last long, but the entire invasion (Anglo-Zulu War) was one of sad loss.
May 31, 2016 @ 06:09:12
Thanks for telling me… certainly will read up more.
May 31, 2016 @ 03:12:17
Oh gosh.. this reminds
me of an entire Summer
of Digging as a research
associate in Archaeology
way back in ’83.. so young..
as Anthropology IS A degree
of miNd.. never a breeze across
holes that never end.. shovels
that alway dig.. dam it..
this frigging brown
collar work..
not college
boy stuff.. i felt then..
hehe.. now i’m tougher..
Bring on the hell hEat.. it’S
better than nOthing iN REAL HeLL..
oh.. wet behind the ears.. green with
no understanding then oF REAL BREEZE..:)
May 31, 2016 @ 05:50:22
😊 You know breezes!
May 31, 2016 @ 07:56:29
i
Wanna bE
Air..;)
May 31, 2016 @ 12:51:57
Wonderful! I DO adore shape poems and this is perfect!
May 31, 2016 @ 13:45:01
Thanks, Lillian. 😊
May 31, 2016 @ 14:38:03
“I’m afraid I had a little fun with the words.” Why are you “afraid”? The shape of the words added some wonderful depth and colour to this! I could almost feel that breeze because of the way you placed the word on the page 🙂
May 31, 2016 @ 15:04:59
Thanks. I always find myself apologizing when I think I’ve broken dome rule! Just starting to discover the freedom in writing! 😊
May 31, 2016 @ 15:33:20
That’s one of the beauties of poetry: the most important role is “feel free to break the rules” 🙂
May 31, 2016 @ 19:03:31
I do like the painstaking format of this and how it lends itself to the words as written, Loreen. Nicely done.
May 31, 2016 @ 19:42:36
Thank you. 😊
May 31, 2016 @ 19:58:59
I love how you have shown as well as told.
May 31, 2016 @ 20:10:43
🙂 It was fun to write.
Jun 01, 2016 @ 00:03:08
I hope you enjoyed the construction of this piece because it sure was enjoyable to read!!
An interesting story… and thank goodness for the breeze in the end.
Jun 01, 2016 @ 05:28:44
I did indeed; it was good fun to play with.
Jun 01, 2016 @ 11:04:38
clever and concise and to use that modern phraseology ‘cool’
Jun 01, 2016 @ 14:00:42
😊
Jun 02, 2016 @ 09:37:39
I loved your fun with the words, and your little story.
Jun 02, 2016 @ 15:31:35
Thanks! 😊
Jun 03, 2016 @ 14:43:54
You paint a vivid picture with your words.
Jun 03, 2016 @ 15:19:41
😊 Thank you.