Wow!  It has been a   L O N G   time since I have been here.

Returning I am full of questions:
Why do I have a blog?  What does this place mean to me?
To whom / for whom am I writing?
Why here and not in a paper journal?
Where am I going?
How will I start (again)?
(I suppose with this post at least that question is answered.)

My life has always been full-to-overflowing.
Very little quiet.  Very little calm.
Big noisy turbulent childhood family.
Big noisy turbulent varsity life.
Big noisy turbulent teaching career.
Big noisy turbulent bigger-than-life me.

I used to envy the quiet demure peaceful lady in the corner.
She’s an excellent listener.  Nods at all the appropriate times.
Gives the encouraging, “Yes, go on!”
I always came away blessed, so blessed, by her.
And jealous of her demeanour.

Till one day when she spoke up.
“I need to tell you,” she began
“that I have always envied you.
You are bold and outgoing, self-confident and full of joy.
You have blessed me time-and-time again!”

And then she thanked me.
SHE thanked ME!
And I laughed
as I boisterously shared my secret covetous heart with her.

I think this place is a place where I can empty some of that exuberance

and in a quiet way
sort the noise from the joy.

Maybe.
We’ll see.

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